They say it happens, I said it will not. How can something so heart-wrenching become matter-of-fact. In fact, I vowed that I will not let it happen.

It happened yesterday. The usual lump in the throat, the tears swimming in the eyes were absent. I was calm and composed as I spoke about losing my grandpa and the pain I felt after that.

I hate myself for it. How can I do it? How can I talk about losing my grandpa in such a matter-of-factly way?

I hate myself.
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2 Comments:

Inexplicably said...

Dunno how old you are but I felt like saying this after reading your post :

Welcome to the 'grown up' world. Everything is matter of fact. Or should be.

Pooh! said...

May be I am grown-up as you put it... but the problem I do not want to be matter of fact. I want to be more real with more feelings than accept things.. yeah I am proving how grown-up I am indeed!

Thanks for dropping by my blog